inspiration needed!

scars
jaycee bien

Caught in a past love, whining, wishing, pleading.
Left in the current, washed away by the flow.
Tears trickling, looking beyond the sky, needing.
Am I not worth your love? Asking the stars aglow.

Am I just that silly pretending or just too naive?
Let alone tricked by your selfish intent!
Cursed by your ways; broken by your lies in an eve
full of false hopes and desires; all invent!

Still, I'm here, struggling with the pain you'd left,
hoping that someday these wounds would heal,
and the scars' the only ones left,
to be reminisced, devoid of emotion to feel.

This is my final attempt (yet hopefully not the last) to make a poem after all the inspirations flew away with the wind, as Mr. Roda words continued to resound in my head. I felt so scared of holding a pen and paper just to pour out all my thoughts on it; just to prove myself that I will never end up like him. And cruel him, he even affected my sketching skills! Now, I think, my skills are all rusting out. Thanks to him!

Anyway, I think, I just needed a new space, a new life, and a new inspiration, all for the benefit of improving myself. The poem in the right helped me so well before, but now its magic spell had finally ceased hold of my emotions. Though still I had no idea whoever wrote it, I would like to personally thank him/her for giving this to me, for it brought about fruitful years of penning poems that now I lost my touch with.

Anyway the poem above is dedicated to a friend. This is the only thing that I can give her to emphasize with her sufferings, cause I'm not physically present with her to grieve with all her hardships, and be one of the so called "crying shoulders".

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